Queer Eye for 2020

Stephen and I have a TV watching schedule every evening that follows a similar pattern - Masterchef Australia, Queer Eye and The Big Bang Theory. In short these three shows (out of a plethora of choices) tick the boxes of what we need in the evenings - good looking food, feel good endings and familiarity. Based on our viewing choices I think we all need the above, and many of us are not getting them at present.

Queer Eye gets me every time. If you haven’t watched it it’s about five of the most flamboyantly incredible homosexual men who are specialists in fields like fashion, home design, grooming etc who take on a person in great need of a makeover - both inside and out and in a week they transform their lives - inside and out. I think what I love most is the scope of people who are volunteered by family and friends to undergo these transformations. Sometimes I wonder how our Queer Guys are going to manage the sometimes reticent participants. I have come to the conclusion that they actually just hug the person into submission. There is a lot of affection in Queer Eye.

And every participant - from the DJ on Jersey Shore to the stay at home mom in Philadelphia to the six foot tall dog groomer has a secret pain that needs to be faced in the process of their transformation. There is always a great shame, or anxiety, or expectation, or failure that they cover in their grotesque beards, bulky clothes, beige tracksuits or compulsive sunbed sessions.

And Karamo and the boys bring these fears to the light and assist them in moving forward.

All of us have that pendant of fear that we carry with us. It’s part of the human condition. And most of us hide behind beards and kak tracksuits in order to appear as functional as possible. For some the burden is heavier than it is for others. But we keep our secrets, like a slow poisonous drip, because the presentation of normal is what must happen in normal life.

Enter 2020 pursued by a pangolin.

No more normal.

And suddenly the things we have kept secret are no longer secret because it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know that actors are sitting at home, unemployed, lost in the characters they once had the opportunity to play, unsure of when they will be able to put the mask back on. And owners of guest houses, hotels, BnBs dust the rooms they worked so hard to fill. And chefs make meals for their families. And journalists scramble to find that low key editing work they wouldn’t  have dreamed of doing six months ago. And  millions of people stare at their work clothes hanging up in their cupboards, now obsolete. There is no work to go to. One of the biggest secret pains, the burden of money, is now very much an open wound.

It’s very hard to keep up with the Jones’s when the Jones’s know you have no money.

Every day I am both burdened and amazed at the courage people of showing in the face of all this. An unemployed actor, with a history of mental illness, selling food to his community in order to be able to feed his own family - now that’s courage. A young school boy sells face masks online in order to try and pay for his school fees because his parents have lost their entire income - now that’s courage. Desperate mothers ask for assistance from strangers  in order to get food - now that’s courage. Heath care workers saying they cannot go on because this is all just too painful - now that’s courage. The entire world saying that is is frightened and confused and paranoid and anxious and grieving - now that’s a miracle.

The masks are down. This has been shit for almost everyone. No one is pretending it isn’t.

Last night on Masterchef rules for social distancing were put into place. COVID arrived in Australia midway through the filming of the series. Even my feel good cooking show now keeps people at arms length and contestants stops to sanitize their hands every 15 minutes.

Guys this is so terrible. We are heavy with it. But we are also not alone with it. Let’s not wait for five gay guys to hug this pain into the light. I see you. We see you. We love you. Let’s own these fears and in so doing let them become part of a greater collective of humanity. I may not have money for you but I may have clothes for your baby. I may not have a job for you but I know of someone looking for voice over artists. I may not have money for your bond but I know someone with a cottage.

I may not be able to hug you but I’m in this with you. We all are.