Tolle Lege Lent day 21

One of the activities planned this year for the Kearsney Centenary celebration  that wasn't scuppered by the blasted virus has been the continuous reading of the New Testament from beginning to end. We started yesterday and in an epic relay of reading we read through the night into this morning. The reading slots were 10 minutes long and could either be read in person in the chapel or online from home. People from all over the world with some connection to Kearsney participated and at 13:00 yesterday the mammoth task of keeping the word of God continuously rolling from Matthew to Revelation began.

I was both a reader and part of the team who took turns to manage an hour of reading slots during the night. I ended up reading twice during the night. I wasn’t supposed to read twice but a scheduling error saw me come on off the benches. An impact reader if you will.

Before I started my reading I prayed that God would reveal something to me in the passages I ended up reading.  

My first reading was from John and the other one later on in the evening was from Acts. 

In the first passage Jesus had been arrested and was taken before Pilate. Pilate interrogated Jesus several times in the build up to His crucifixion. There was some flogging that happened in between so we can assume that Jesus was in pretty bad shape during some of these chats. 

What is interesting about the exchanges Pilot had with Jesus is that he was absolutely flummoxed as to why Jesus’ own people wanted Him crucified. He kept questioning why they would seek his death and free someone like Barrabas instead. 

Despite being questioned by the highest legal authority in the land Jesus remained completely true to the most powerful authority, his Father. He never faltered from the truth and we know that no amount of torture or second chances would steer Him from His destiny. 

Fast forward a couple of years (and in fact about 2020 in my case) and I randomly read my second passage of the evening where Paul is brought before Felix by the Jewish authorities and is accused by his own people of being a ‘troublemaker’. After several discussions with Paul Felix too is unsure what he should do with Paul so he just leaves him in jail. The Jews kept pressing the Romans to deal with Paul until he is eventually brought before King Agrippa. Festus, Felix’s successor states to Agrippa that he can find no reason to have Paul killed despite the entire Jewish community petitioning for his death. 

And that’s as far as I got in my reading. 

Two readings - two men brought before the law by their own people. Both lawmakers could find nothing to persecute. The two accused remain firm in their belief despite torture and years of imprisonment. 

But what can this mean for me?

It means that sometimes the people around me, my people, will disappoint me. It means that sometimes I might be the only one to believe something that only I can see. It means that we all are going to feel betrayed by humans because we are all, after all, human.

It means that sometimes I too will be the betrayer. That I will fail to find the truth in someone else’s words. That my need for power, or to be right, or to be popular will mean that I let someone down. That I may be baying for innocent blood too.

It also means that (as the biggest goodie two shoes you will ever meet) sometimes the people in charge are actually not the be all and end all. That they’re also just human like me. That sometimes, as leaders, they will be equally perplexed by the demands of the people in their charge. It also means that leaders will sometimes be a cop out and just not do anything rather than doing something. And sometimes their inactivity will lead to unnecessary losses.

It means that I need to know that if I serve my God and remain true to His word for me and my life I will find hope in all situations. No matter how alone I feel I will never be alone. It means that my destiny is bigger than those around me and those in charge of me. And so although I will continue to respect the systems put into place to keep the laws of this world in order I will always answer to a higher authority first. And it is this authority who will give me grace in all situations.

At midnight at the end of my two readings I walked my way though an empty school campus. The only lights to be seen were streaming from the stained glass windows of our chapel. Inside my fellow readers picked up from where I had left off. They carried the word of God into the silent hours of the morning. 

Jesus and Paul were betrayed by those who should have been rejoicing with them. And there have and will be times in my life where feel the same. But in that moment outside the chapel I felt more part of the family of Christ than I have in a long time. And it is thanks to those who were unafraid to be the bearers of truth some two thousand years ago that I can be part of this glorious truth today.